I have frequently heard about the life changing effects of meditation from enthusiasts. It often comes across with religious fervor and intensity. It often includes jargon that doesn’t make sense to a technical person like me. How exactly does one “hold space?”
Notwithstanding my skepticism, I’ve tried a few times over the last 40 years to meditate.
I got nowhere.
I can’t stay still in silence.
I either fall asleep or fidget with an itch or a cramp. Nope. Meditation didn’t work for me. I wasn’t looking for a religion. I was skeptical that it could deliver life changing impacts. Plus, I was bad at it.
However, I kept running into people I respected, for whom meditation was a core value. These folks were often social entrepreneurs doing terrific work or philanthropists willing to bet on risky social entrepreneurs. They weren’t zealots. You might know them and appreciate their work for years without meditation coming up at all.
I was talking to a major donor in the field who I really respect. He brought up meditation too. Seeing my skepticism, he recommended that I read the book 10% Happier, which I did. Hearing that meditation might make me 10 percent happier seemed a pretty low bar—much more realistic than a complete life overhaul.
As a result of reading the book, I became a bit more open to giving meditation another try. Then, as luck would have it, I got invited into The Wellbeing Project.
The Wellbeing Project takes social sector leaders and gives them a month of intense programming—spread out over 18 months—to focus only on their wellbeing. Social entrepreneurs tend to sacrifice themselves for their mission, and some major donors in the field wanted to support something that brought back a bit more balance. Nice!
One of the resources the Wellbeing Project offered was the Headspace meditation app. I had tried it a once before, but it didn’t take.
Headspace is a guided meditation app, where Andy, a former Buddhist monk, walks you through hundreds of recorded audio meditations. The key thing about Andy is he’s not judgmental. If your mind wanders off during a meditation like mine often does, then suddenly Andy says, “Hey, if you wandered off for a while, just bring your mind back to focusing on the breath.”
As a person with an obsessive focus on doing the right thing, it was huge for me to not get feedback that I was failing. The idea that occasionally falling asleep or not paying attention or having your mind wander during meditation is no problem, worked great for me.
It didn’t change my life completely. It didn’t convert me to Buddhism.
But I am easily 10 percent happier.
Happiness is tricky to measure, but it’s noticeable in small and objectively measurable ways. I am at least 10 percent (and often much more):
And the benefits of meditating don’t just flow to me. It affects my family and the people I work with in our efforts of social change. One of my adult sons recently took me aside and expressed his appreciation that I was working hard on being a more calm and flexible person. Big moment.
Meditation is just not that hard. For me, it’s 3 to 10 minutes in the morning after I get up. Not a huge sacrifice for being 10 percent better with the people I love and work with.
I’m a skeptical tech person, but I got over the hump and gave it a try, and I can see the benefits. The key for me was to have a more modest objective. Not a life changing shift, not a new religion, but something that might make you 10 percent happier. More realistic means more achievable.
So, you might want to give meditation a try. We’re holding a space for you.
“File:Novices meditating.jpg” by Honey Kochphon Onshawee is licensed under CC0 1.0
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